Trying to make meaning

A summer off, unwanted, undesired, but off all the same. Since it was not within my control, and therefore not expected, I have been faced with the choice of what to do with it. Answer: I want to make it count. Just as the last 6 months has been constant activity in the service of something that felt contrived and at a place I felt constrained, I want to make this summer be work for me in ways that have meaning for me. To do that means that no day can be wasted. I must keep putting one step in front of the other. If that is only a few feet of progress, that's okay, but to be honest even that is not enough. I need to excel this summer, but excel not at what others place before me, but at what I place before me. If this is who I am, if this is what I am, then I must be the damned best at it that I can be.